I know, I know. I’ve already tried to create regular post ideas in order to get me to write more. And they have failed, miserably. But hey, I’m spending so much of time at work every week – being online, overhearing things I probably shouldn’t, nurturing giggle fits – this could just work, right?
So this week I thought I’d write all the things I’ve heard or seen that have made me nearly spit out my hot tea.
1) “They’re not that talented but that that last minute quickie gave them a semi” – talking about a local football game the rival team won which put them in the semi-finals
2) “Oh my God dudes, this Gusvinder is too badass dude. That old man went ring-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding-ding and TAPAR! What a scene!” Seems the office has come on board the Breaking Bad Train
3) Colleague 1 – Dude, what’s your gaming name? I’ll add you
Colleague 2 – Cock
Colleague 1 – What?
Colleague 2 – Cock dude. Who doesn’t want cock? Come on, it’s that Heisenberg speech!
Colleague 1- Oh, you mean coke
Colleague 2 – Yes, that’s what I said. Cock.
4) “I don’t know why he has to detail every single thing he does in the gym, like he’s so macho. I just want to tell him – Dude, unless you fall of the treadmill or drop the weights on your face, I don’t want to know”
5) “For the last time, this is not lipstick. It’s a lip conditioner. It’s like pimped up chapstick. For men”
6) Colleague 1 – Why is there an England Flag on your desk?
Colleague 2 – Oh Britain and India have had like a thing like forever now. You didn’t know?
7) “Need a shrink? Go to a woman and she’ll psychoanalyse you for free and then try to save you. Win win dude”
8) “Have you heard the new Miley Cyrus song? Racking Ball yaar, What a masterpiece!”
9) Kid – Uncle, give me one Bisleri bottle, 1 litre.
Shopkeeper – Which one?
Kid – Aquafina
10) “You need to first master the art of thinking to think outside the box. Dumbass”
(If you have a list you’d like to share, or if you have ideas for top tens I could write up, don’t forget to leave a comment!)
Britain and India have a thing, omg :DDD
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Haha, I know. One of these days I will explode from holding in too much laughter!
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That’s a good thing though 🙂
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Absolutely! My colleagues are hilarious!
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Glad to hear that.
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How’s your work going?
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Haven’t started yet. My job starts on November 4th.
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For some reason I thought it was October 4th
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Huh, that’s funny.
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HAHAHAHA the football one! Trying so hard not to laugh here!!!
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The football one really had me in splits. I had half a mind to ask them how that team were dealing with their semis. Then I decided to be adult about it and shut up! 😀
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Being an adult is too mainstream 😀 having the mind of a 14 year old boy is a LOT more fun!!!
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Amen to that!
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Rofl!!!!! Just gets better 4 down ;). I have a list of the dumb things people have asked me about India in the U.S. But there’s no way of writing that without sounding racist! Where’s work for you? New job?
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Haha, yeah. You should totally write those down. Personal opinions and stuff, right? I want to hear these stories! I work in an organisation that develops educational video games. Yep, new place!
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Aliosa.
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#10 is the one! Love it!
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I’m dying to use it on someone!
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OOOOh that would be such fun….
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Funny. Very cool to have a post about this stuff.
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Thank you so much Michael!
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