Bob’s my uncle

I grew up in a household that had guests from around the world come in and come out. My parents worked as consultants to the German Government’s development projects in India. So when we had their colleagues come in, my frantic mum who was always elbow deep in making the house look welcoming would set up a chant for days.

“The Germans are coming! The Germans are coming!”

She didn’t realise what she was saying and why we were laughing till the next time we had German visitors, I set off the sirens, the dogs and the kids with jolly chants of “The Germans are coming” We still tease my mum about it and brings to mind the curious thing called – Stereotype.

This morning I learnt that my cousins from Australia are visiting. I know this because my broseph greeted me with a ‘G’day Mate! Fancy a cuppa Fosters?’. I had to tell him that Aussies don’t drink Fosters in much the same way Elephants don’t roam the streets of Bangalore but he said he didn’t want to get into a ‘barney’

What is the world was a barney?

He then went on to talk about Duck’s Dinners and investing in Eskies and how Bob’s my uncle. Then he went on to talk like Matt Preston with his dollops of cream and breaking down the chook before vac packing it.

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The only Australian slang I know, I picked up from travelling in Tanzania and the UK with my Banana Bender friend. My cousins are from Sydney so I’m not sure the same slang applies. Anyway, I digress. I think the point I wanted to make was that as much as we hate being stereotyped, there’s something hilarious about picking up and using slang. The last time they visited us, I told the littlest one that she had a funny accent. She went on to say “YOU have an accent. You sound like Apu”

Fair enough.

This time I want to be prepared. I have those “I love you” koala’s I’m going to stick on my sleeve. I’ve already practiced my sports chants and I’m going to congratulate them on their marvellous victory in the Ashes. All that’s left is to pick up the slang¬†which, in my opinion, should be a skill you put on your resume.¬†Wish me luck!


Aussie Aussie Aussie Oi Oi Oi