It feels like I have been on the edge of a nervous breakdown for the past two months – I can feel it simmering, boiling just below the surface, threatening to do me in at any time. It is a new feeling to me and most of it comes from me wanting to be in control of where my life is going. I know from experience that control and perfection it is a silly delusion and yet you hope that you can wave a magic wand and everything will be where it needs to be.
I have left everything behind to start from scratch in a foreign land. I have been in dangerous situations and lived to tell the tale. I have been cut off from home till climbing a tree once a week for signal was my only connection with the world. I rinse and repeat every time the fancy hits me. But this, this is an adventure on a whole new level.
It is scary and exhilarating. It is frustrating and joy inducing. It is such a mix and match of raw emotions that I feel challenged like I have never been before. To be yourself while being with another individual, how come they don’t tell you just how much work goes into it?
Long Distance has been a revelation and it has felt like a full time job. There are times when I’ve wondered at the resilience and perseverance of humans. How do we do it, how do we wake up in the morning and play at all the many things that need to be done to ‘live’. Are we an amazing race or just someone who’s survived by putting one foot in front of the other?
I read this amazing post this morning from the Intrepid Misadventurer about our obsession with Glass Half Empty and Glass Half Full syndrome.
“ We’ve created social ecosystems to cater to this need of lives awash with our curated bliss, and perhaps that is part of the truth, but definitely far from any absolute! Aren’t the biggest changes borne out of reaching rock-bottoms? of being thrust against the wall and finding the way back? Hasn’t ‘necessity’ always been the mother of invention? Where does personal growth, re-evalution and honest re-assessments have a chance without the ability to see the possibility of something better? Think relationships, think finance — the two most volatile aspects of life as we know it! The glass half empty is sometimes a leveller- a realist’s perspective, it’s a chance to acknowledge that real problem solving is hardly something that swathes itself in mindless positivity and hedonism. So much of our modern maladies stems from the fact that our generation lacks the grit that our forebearers had and I, being no social expert, see the hand of complacent pleasure seeking in it!“
Read the full article here
End Rant 😀
This Labyrinth I Roam 
I don;t think this generation lacks grit. Perhaps the grit is less in evidence, but it is still there. I think you have demonstrated true grit already.
LikeLike
Making a major change in your life is always an exhilarating challenge as well as a big risk where we fear that we’ve made the wrong decision. Of course there is only one way to find out, and the truth is that on some level it is both. Both, you may ask (unless you’ve already figured this out), the exhilaration comes from knowing that you could be wrong but that you are willing to risk that. That’s where the glass half full comes in. To my mind, the glass exists and that it has contents. The amount of content doesn’t really matter.
Have I been sufficiently obscure?
LikeLike
You need to write more about this. Your post raises more questions than it gives answers.
LikeLike
I hope everything comes together for you, (which, I feel sure it will)! You have tremendous tenacity to maintain a long distance relationship and things will work out for you. All the best. Kevin
LikeLike
I am sure you will sort this problem out, we send you a virtual hug from Italy
LikeLike
You echo my thoughts so beautifully! Your journey reminds me of mine, just a few years ago. Last Friday, I went to a civil wedding ceremony and the officiant said, “Marriage (it can mean a committed monogamous relationship) is the most trying but also one of the most rewarding of human relationships.” You are doing great. I can’t wait to hear more. I recently was cleaning out gmail, and I found our long, ridiculous chats! I wanted to say “thank you” for being there when I was struggling to be myself but also becoming a bit of Sid. I am sorry to have dropped of the radar over the last few years. But I promise to do more. Heck, I have a tag called “Anju” on my blog. I wish you all the happiness and the grit to not sabotage it 😉 Love and hugs.
LikeLike
Please edit my previous comment to read “dropped OFF” not “dropped of” and then delete this 😀
LikeLike
I think the fact that you’ve kept a long distance relationship going on as long as you have is evidence of both your strength and commitment! The adage ‘nothing good comes easy’ is so, so true 🙂 No situation in life is ever free from you being up against the wall at some point, and this I can say with conviction; but it does pass and you’re ‘free’ again to dream, plan and execute the days of life. X
(P.S. Seeing my post referenced is a surprise as much as it is an honor. Thank you :))
LikeLike
Change is exciting, but it isn’t easy. And I’ve always thought, what’s the purpose? why get up each day and try? Not sure I have the answer to life’s riddle, but I keep going. Best of luck to you.
LikeLike
May you grow all the more stronger, all the more resilient for it. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much Kev
LikeLiked by 1 person
Anytime. 😉
LikeLike
Relationships are difficult by their very nature…And long distance relationships are even more so. I admire your tenacity and strength…Good luck! I hope things work out for you…
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much
LikeLiked by 1 person